Wednesday, October 17, 2012

A Comprehensive Guide To Every Cat Running For Political Office In 2012

It's been a groundbreaking year for felines in politics, with a record number of cats declaring their intent to run for office. Follow along as we take a closer look into this year's clowder of qualified candidates, and help you decide which kitty deserves your vote.

Name: Hank 
Running for: U.S. Senate seat in Virginia
Party: Independent
Age: 9
Platform: Jobs, Animal Rescue / Spay & Neuter programs, and Positive Campaign Reform
Facebook Followers: 27,000+
Running Mate: No running mate, but Hank recently teamed up with Tuxedo Stanley (below), a fellow feline politician from Canada. Together, the two formed NAFTA ("North America Felines to Action!") and are selling a poster to celebrate their alliance. All proceeds raised by Hank's campaign will benefit the Oasis Animal Rescue in Oshawa, Ontario, Canada, while sales from Stan's store go to Spay Day HRM.
Celebrity Endorsements: Gwen Cooper, New York Times Bestselling author of "Homer's Odyssey: A Fearless Feline Tale" and Zarathustra, the Russian fat cat famous for being photoshopped into classic paintings.
Scandal: Back in March, a group called "Canines for a Feline Free Tomorrow" launched a smear campaign against the kitty candidate, charging he's just another "fat cat" trying to get elected into office. The puppy PAC drew attention to Hank's vet records, made allegations of catnip abuse, and even questioned whether or not a Maine Coon should really be running for Senate in Virginia. Hank's campaign manager denied all of the claims, stating: “Hank will not respond to these allegations, and will continue on his positive campaign of job creation, spay/neuter programs, and ridding the Capitol of rats.”
Campaign Swag: T-shirts, totes, mugs, bumper stickers, buttons, posters, and more. The proceeds from Hank's campaign merchandise are donated to animal shelters, and he has raised over $15,000 to date.

Name: Tuxedo Stanley
Running for: Mayor of Halifax
Party: Tuxedo Party
Age: 3
Platform: To improve the welfare of homeless, abandoned and suffering cats in Halifax Regional Municipality, "because neglect isn't working."
Facebook Followers: 8,800+
Running Mate: None, but he is an ally of Hank for Senate (see above)
Celebrity Endorsements: Anderson Cooper, Ellen DeGeneres, and Henri, le Chat Noir, who gave his fellow tuxie a meow-out in his latest video. Stan has also convinced several candidates and council members to sign a pledge of compassion and action to assist local cats in need.

Scandal: Controversy rocked the Tuxedo Party when it was reported that a cat named Bella claimed Stan was the father of her kittens. The campaign released an official statement denying the charges, later confirming, "CSI tests have conclusively proven that Tuxedo Stan is NOT the father of Mini Stan and Stanette."
Campaign Swag: Posters, buttons, t-shirts, and photos.

Name: Morris the Cat
Running for: President of the United States
Party: Felines First Party
Age: Unknown, although the original Morris the Cat was discovered at the Hinsdale Humane Society in Chicago in 1968.
Platform: Eliminating empty food bowls, forever homes for all cats, and freedom of attitude.
Running Mate: Stubbs the Cat, the 15-year mayor of Talkeetna, Alaska.
Facebook Followers: 142,000+
Celebrity Endorsements: None, although he is a celebrity in his own right, having represented 9Lives cat food for for the past 44 years.
Scandal: Not so much a scandal, but this will be the famous orange spokescat's third bid at office. It’s been more than 20 years since Morris’ last run at the Oval Office, initially making history as the first feline to try for the presidency in 1988, followed by his second run in 1992. Will the third time be the charm?
Campaign Swag: Facebook fans can download a free election poster, insert their own cat’s face, and share with Facebook friends and Twitter followers, all in support of Morris’ platform and vision. For each share of the campaign poster on Facebook, the Morris campaign will contribute one bowl of 9Lives cat food to Pets Are Wonderful Support, San Francisco (PAWS San Francisco), up to 3,000 lbs. of cat food. (Note: This goal was met shortly after the campaign went live).

Name: Stubbs the Cat
Running for: President of the United States
Party: Demeowcatic Repurrblican Party
Age: 15. Stubbs was elected mayor of Talkeetna, Alaska through a write-in ballot as a kitten, and has held the honorary post ever since.
Platform: "I support the removal of all restrictions on catnip, a law improving access to health care for domesticated animals, and a Constitutional amendment banning leash laws."
Running Mate: A dog named Lucy Lou.
Facebook Followers: His newly created presidential campaign page has 250 fans, but his Mayor Stubbs page boasts 26,000+
Celebrity Endorsements: N/A
Scandal: Obviously Mayor Stubbs missed the memo that Morris the Cat had already chosen him as his VP running mate when he decided to announce his candidacy. No official response from Morris yet on how this will effect his campaign.
Campaign Swag: None...yet.

Name: Hello Kitty
Running for: President of the United States
Party: Friendship Party
Age: 38
Platform: Friendship, fun and happiness because, "you can never have too many friends!"
Running Mate: Currently open for a public vote on her Facebook page. Fans can choose from Sanrio favorites like Tuxedosam, Badtz-Maru, My Melody, Keroppi, or Chococat. Voting is open until Oct 31, and My Melody is currently in the lead with 27.7% of the vote.
Facebook Following: 10 million+
Celebrity Endorsements: Who doesn't love Hello Kitty?
Scandal: There's been ongoing controversy over whether she is an English citizen or Japanese national. We can't be sure until we see her official birth certificate, but I think it's safe to say that she is not a natural-born citizen of the United States.
Campaign Swag: T-shirts, headbands, key rings, buttons, and stickers. 

Priscilla purrformed her civic duty. Have you?

Cats vs. Dogs: America's Pet Debate

Sick and tired of human candidates arguing like cats and dogs, and want to cast a vote that really counts? To help end the age-old debate of whether America is a nation of cat or dog people, Purina is calling all pet lovers to join in “America’s Pet Debate.” From now until Nov. 8, you can vote for your favorite pet (cats!!) once a day at

For every vote, Purina will donate $1, up to $100,000, to Pet Partners’ Veteran Programs. The donation will help fund Pet Partners pet therapy teams for U.S. veterans by providing the mental, physical and emotional support of cats and dogs through animal-assisted therapy. (Since voting started, there have been 61,705 votes cast/dollars raised to date). 

Felines are currently commanding the lead with 55% of the vote, but there's still time for a shake-up, so be sure to rock the ballot and help raise cash for a good cause. Purina will declare whether America is a cat or dog nation on Nov. 9, 2012.



katsrus said...

I think this is a fun way to raise monies and get attention for all these great programs and kitties. Joined all their pages. Thanks for posting all the links.
Sue B

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